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Man-a-ruptions

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WTF does that mean, you ask? It could mean a number of things.  You could take it down many really interesting somewhat dirty routes, but in my case it means something much more boring. It means:

Having the uncanny ability to walk in to the room during the last 5 minutes of a TV show, movie, game, etc. 

Does this ever happen to you? I would have to say that this is  pretty much on a nightly basis at my house.  I’m usually REALLY into the last 5 minutes of some really awesome TV show, like Scandal, and BAM!!!!!  ”Honey, did you blah,blah, blah? ” After shooting him the I’m-going-to-fucking-kill-you-if-you-speak-to-me-again look, he says, “Oh!  I didn’t realize you were in the middle of something!” Seriously?  I mean nearly EVERY.FUCKING.NIGHT I retire to our bedroom for a couple of hour of absolutely mindless crap on TV.  It’s my escape.  It’s my relaxation.  It’s what I’ve done for practically all of our dating and married relationship!!!!!!. AND HE CAN’T STAND IT!  He is go, go, go, go all the damn time. He’s always working on something, whether it be his daytime job or his obsession with finances.  Getting this man to relax it really tough!! It exhausts me to even try to live in that man’s brain for any period of time – 2 min or an hour, so I guess it shouldn’t surprise me that he probably can’t live in my mind for 2 min and understand my need to relax and unwind.

Now, you’d think over the course of almost 20 years, I’d have gotten used to this. I probably have and thank the ever-loving gods that some genius soul invented the DVR.  I think we’d be divorced by now if that wondrous machine hadn’t come into our lives.  We were even late to the game on getting this.  I think everyone on the planet had one WAY before we did.  I BEGGED him for one. He just didn’t see the need. Now, HE can’t live without it either!  Ah, pausing a TV show.  Rewinding what you may have missed.  (insert angels singing and playing harps here) How did we EVER live without this functionality? It sure would have made life a TON easier when the kids were babies.  Instead, we had to use that archaic VCR thang. Getting to watch any recorded thing didn’t ever happen much back then though. I think unwinding was on pause for AT LEAST 4-5 years back then. So happy to have it back!

So, I would totally be OK with this, or at least able to live with this, until Felix did it to me last night!  This is the one that is the absolute “mini-me” of his Dad. OMFG!  I couldn’t believe it!  He did it to me in the last 5 minutes of The Voice last night! I think I turned around on him faster than any of those four chairs have ever turned with that same,  I’m-going-to-fucking-kill-you-if-you-speak-to-me-again look. First of all, don’t ever fuck with me watching Adam Levine – EVER- or Blake Shelton for that matter! Secondly, PLEASE don’t start this shit at age 11!!!!  PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

adam-levine-blake-shelton-the-voice-season-5-promo-nbc

NBC The Voice Season 5 promo
Two of my FAVORITES! (flutter, swoon!)

For the sake of his girlfriend, wife, significant other of the future, I must figure out a way of breaking this one of this habit!!!!  I will make this my mission in life! As God as my witness………………..

Adding man-a-ruptions in with the man period during every full moon (as in right now)…..I’ve got my work cut out for me! My whole fucking house is insane at the moment.  Even the damned dog!

P.S. Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. Between keeping up with the sporting events at my house and trying to keep my head on straight, it’s been a wild couple of weeks!



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